Today is the 27th of April. In three days, April 30th, I will attempt what my grandfather, and his father before him, tried and perform the ritual to draw out the HGA on my own.
Known as the Rite of Abramelin, I’m rather excited and find it difficult to focus on the day to day management required to recreate this entire process in a totally digital version.
Tagged blair family, HGA, personalBefore I begin to figure out a way to translate what I’m discovering about the HGA into a useful communication app, I actually experience many of these processes in the flesh. Toward that end I’ve taken my grandfather’s notes and actually assembled everything I need to perform the “ritual.” Keeping in mind that none one has had proof of success, in my family or among the other members of the HOOTGD, I’m not holding out much hope for success, but still believe there is value in the process.
Getting these “varied” items together was an accomplishment in itself (procuring a Wand made of almond-tree wood, while seemingly simple errand, requires first knowing how one actually makes a “wand” to begin with…) and that is something I can at least be quite proud of considering how new I am to the whole world of myth and magick.
Tagged blair family, HGA, personalI apologize for the seemingly long delay in posting the results of the live Ritual. For what it is worth, I’m now absolutely certain that the information contained within the pages of the Blair Family Chronicles (the name I’ve given to the collection of journals written by various members of my family) is all true. Every scrap, every hurried note, every cryptic scribble.
The Ritual…
Ugh.
Taking deep breaths so my fingers can actually hit the keys correctly.
The Ritual was a failure and in fact, almost kills me. It was the most frightening experience of my life and though it brought me face to face with unspeakable horrors, I will begin to collect the necessary items to perform the Ritual again soon. How could I not? It’s all true! And if it is true and knowledge and power are truly within my grasp, I really don’t have much of a choice but to see this through to the end.
What is more important though, and what has me excited about another attempt is that I’ve discovered something wrong with my Grandfather’s notes. If I’m right, I can fix what went wrong and… and actually attain the knowledge and conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel.
Tagged blair family, HGA, personalThere are demons and angels all around us. They work in the light and shadows, places we normally can’t see because we’re not worthy. There is a war and we’re all part of it even if we are unaware.
If it sounds like the plot to a game, you’re right and this is how I intend to carry on my grandfather’s work… technology has solved many of man’s greatest mysteries and I’m sure that this one can also be solved with it too. In case you’re wondering, the idea of computer science helping solve theological mysteries or puzzles isn’t new. There have been a great number of people who have used computer science in his pursuit of truth. I’m just using it… a little differently.
Tagged blair family, development, game clientOk. I know I promised you guys a little insight, so I’ll start with a little history.
Many of the male heirs in the Blair family have been a part of a secretive (surprise!) organization known as the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn. I really won’t get into much of their history, it is out there for anyone willing to expend the energy, but I will say that their focus, and that of my grandfather, was to make contact with a being known as the Holy Guardian Angel. They whole heartedly believed this being would then bestow great power and knowledge onto those worthy of the Guardian’s attention.
I’m not a religious person. Heck, I’m not even a spiritual person. I’ve spent a large portion of my life playing with ones and zeros, and while code can be akin to poetry to coders, ultimately there isn’t a lot of room for imagination when it comes to code. Sure, it can be clever and it can be beautiful, but imagination won’t help you deliver on a deadline.
I used a specific number for the title of this post and some of you may be wondering if I’m just loopy at this point, and honestly I wouldn’t blame you. The number though should be familiar to anyone who believes in Quantum mysticism, but before you guys call out the men in white coats, I should inform you that I’m not really sold on any of these ideas. But it was a way of being able to bring my world into alignment with that of my grandfather’s world.
I’m not sure I am making sense. It is late and I’m a bit lost in the weeds at the moment.
These journals are apparently really getting to me.
Tagged blair family, development, personalI entered this on a lark, but after reading the journals I’m no longer sure I can stop whatever it is that drives male Blair heirs from diving headlong into the family “business.”
I’m not a religious man, nor even remotely superstitious man, but there is something strange about the information contained in these journals. I’m far from diving headlong into fulfilling my grandfather’s wishes and carry on his “work,” but there is an itch in my brain that I just can’t seem to scratch.
The rational part of me says, “this can’t be true!” Unfortunately, the gullible, silent-for-years, part of me is now becoming a little more vocal I suppose. I’m still leaning towards incredulity, but I may have to take a break from reading these journals! It is a work of staggering imagination, and considering that it was written by a number of men in my family, it is quite fascinating.
Don’t worry guys, you don’t have to call social services on my behalf quite yet.
Tagged blair family, personalIt just gets weirder. Trying to take my mind of jquery for a bit, I picked up the most recent of my grandfather’s journals and happened upon an entry that was written just shortly before the world entered the second world war.
October 30th, 1938 – Two experiences will haunt my days if I live long enough to regret them. The first is being born the son of a madman. The second is ever picking up this journal. Am I too becoming mad? Will my son follow me?
Now, this is extremely odd for two reasons. First, is that my father never spoke much about my Grandfather or my Great Grandfather, and definitely didn’t mention any mental health issues in our family tree. The second is that my grandfather mentions yet another journal, possibly written by his grandfather? Must ask my father what he knows if anything. I’m almost afraid to hear anything my father has to say on the subject.
Tagged blair family, personalOnce again I will stray temporarily from the goal of this blog to dive yet a little deeper into something that is quickly gaining on LAMP as the central focus of my time. After my grandfather passed away, my father finally explained a great deal about our family history and why he prevented my grandfather from continuing to be a part of my life. In addition, he gave me a case filled with journals written by my grandfather (and apparently, other male members of the Blair family dating back to the early 1800s!) that detailed the pursuit of something called the Holy Guardian Angel.
At first I believed it was some kind of hallucination, but perusing the rest of the journals in the case, I now realize if it was a hallucination, it was a hallucination that plagued almost every single male Blair throughout history.
With that in mind, goal oriented personality type non-withstanding, I’ve decided to read each of these journals in order and find out just how deep the rabbit hole goes. Clearly there is some kind of genetic predisposition to delusions although I’m going on record as saying it might have skipped me altogether. I’m not as easily swayed by such fantasy apparently. Perhaps that will change if I can’t get this new App running. Wish me luck.
Tagged blair family, personalWhen I found out that my grandfather had passed away, I had a number of questions about him and his life. Though I spent a good deal of time with him when I was really young, most of that time I couldn’t really understand where he was coming from. The stories my grandfather would tell me seemed fantastic and exciting, but I really believed they were just created for my entertainment. Many of them dealt with something that I’ve now learned he had spent a large part of his life trying to find. Long before I was old enough to understand any of it, or even question the reality behind the stories though, my father broke off all contact with my grandfather and we moved far away.
Over the last few days my father has opened up about my grandfather, filling in details about him and his life. I’m not sure where the fantasy becomes reality, but one thing is certain, he believed in what he was doing even if I have a real hard time believing any of these stories are true. He was an interesting man to say the least. Last night though, my father passed along a case filled with his journals and they are fascinating reading. On the surface, the journal entries seem to be some kind of outline for a novel, clearly fiction, but the intensity of the writing shows a man with conviction. How much of course, remains to be seen, but it is definitely a good way to pass the time between fits of coding.
Tagged blair family, personalMan, I just don’t have the heart for another technical posting. JQuery, LAMP, the atom bomb, these are all just numbers and words, just the inventions of men. There’s no magic in them, no transcendence, no good, no evil. Just circular logic, the chirping of birds, no meaning but what we give them. What insignificance! What utter, meaningless insignificance has been my life to this point!
I know some of you have been worried about me. I don’t blame you (especially after how I must have looked last weekend, Kelly.) No, I haven’t been sleeping well. I haven’t been eating well. I can’t really think about sleep or food right now. I’m in a weird place, and I just need to move, to push forward and make it to the other side. Then everything will be resolved. Everything will be ok. I think.
I guess this explanation, though well intended, is even more alarming. I’m sorry. Really, I would love to bring you guys into my world, to show you exactly what keeps me up at night, what makes me forget to eat for 3 days. But I can’t…yet. I promise though that I’ll share everything soon, just as soon as I can. And everything will be different. Everything will be what it was supposed to be.
I promise.